


innocents

by jessamoo



Category: Reign (TV)
Genre: F/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-10-19
Updated: 2014-10-19
Packaged: 2018-02-21 19:35:48
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,214
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2479958
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/jessamoo/pseuds/jessamoo
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>for the prompt "Bash and Kenna discussing having kids before and after they fell in love"</p>
            </blockquote>





	innocents

She comes across him on one of the balconies. It’s a bright morning, full of sunshine. She thinks the sight of him looking so gloomy all alone is so out of place she can’t help but go over to him.

Kenna herself had been avoiding going out because she had a few aches and bruises from the previous night in the king’s bed. She was hiding here, and she had the sneaking suspicion Bash was doing exactly the same thing.

Her suspicions are confirmed when she sees what he’s looking at. Mary and Francis are off in the distance playing some children’s game with the younger Valois boys.

Everyone at court had seen the way Bash had been looking at Mary recently. Kenna had been glad at first, for it drew some attention away from her dalliances with the king. Now though, seeing his green eyes dull in jealousy and self-pity, she just felt sorry for him.

She stands beside him and he shifts, only just noticing her presence. He doesn’t leave though, as she had half expecting him to.

“You’re not going to join them?” she asks, already knowing the answer.

Bash side eyes her, not fooled and she quirks a challenging eyebrow at him. He sighs loudly and looks back out at the playful scene in front of them.

“Are you thinking about having children, or the person you want to have them with?” she mutters. It’s cruel of her, she supposes. But she was fed up of tip toeing around his feelings when she knew they could easily put him and not to mention Mary in danger.

“Want has nothing to do with it.” He shrugs. “I would only have children with my wife. If I ever marry.”

This surprises her. As a bastard himself she hadn’t expected his view to be against them.

He sees her questioning look and carries on. “I know how difficult it was for my mother here. How hard it is always being seen as lesser because you are a bastard. It isn’t fair, but it’s the way life is. I am luckier than most of my kind but I cannot say the same for any bastards of my own I might have. I wouldn’t knowingly place my child at a disadvantage in life if I could help it.”

Kenna is surprised by his honesty. She didn’t know Bash that well, but for some reason they were able to talk to each other properly. She saw a strange understanding between them, for all their distance.

“Well I’m not very good with children.” She shrugs. She’s trying to lighten the mood but when she carries on, she finds herself reciprocating his truthful confession. “I don’t really like them that much and they don’t like me. I think they can see something in me. Some absence. Something that’s broken. Children have a sixth sense about these things you know. Kind of like dogs.”

Despite himself, Bash’s lips tug upwards in a small smile.

“I’m always dreadfully afraid I wouldn’t be able to love them enough.” She admits quietly, and the sadness in her voice causes Bash to glance at her.

“I don’t think that would be a problem for you.” he says kindly.

Kenna reaches out and puts a hand on his hesitantly. He is about to move his hand away but stops himself, instead wrapping their fingers together.

“You know, Mary has to have children to rule France. She has to give birth to the children of the dauphin. Whoever that may be.” She adds gently, referencing the rumours circling about Bash possibly being made legitimate. 

Bash doesn’t answer, but she feels him grip her hand a little tighter in response.

 

It seemed forever ago, that talk on the balcony. It felt like two completely different people. She was sure the same heart didn’t beat in her chest any more. The feels like the fires of their own respective sadness burnt them down, and the two people here now were the ones that arose from those ashes.

Kenna is breathing heavily, sat up in bed – she had awoken suddenly in a sweat from yet another horrific nightmare.

She flinches suddenly as she feels Bash touch her shoulder softly. She looks down at him with undisguised distress as he sits up next to her.

“Is It Pascal again?” he asks.

She nods and blinks a few tears away, turning to press her face to his neck as he wraps his arms around her.

“I miss him. I couldn’t looks after him and now he’s…”

Bash pulls her tighter to him. “It isn’t your fault Kenna.” He states firmly. He pulls away from her and picks her face up, long fingers under chin.

“I miss him too. But he is at peace now.” He comforts and she nods, trying to convince herself to trust in his words.

“I liked having him here. I…I loved him. I didn’t know I could love a child like that, but I did, and then he was taken away.”

Bash trails his hand down her arm, his fingers marking out a warm path on her skin. They move to her stomach and he catches her eye again as thoughts flood through him.

“I told you loving wasn’t your problem. You have the capacity for tremendous love. I know that. Pascal knew that, and our children will know it in time.”

She lifts her head in surprise then. “Our children?” she whispers. "I thought you only ever wanted to have children with..." she doesn't dare speak Mary's name, but she doesn't need to. Bash looks away from her for a moment. He is not sad for the lack of the other woman. He was sad that he ever felt that way, that he had ever believed he couldn't have children with his wife. He regretted now he had made Kenna think that, especially as she was now the only woman he wanted as the mother of his children. Now he had seen her capacity for gentleness, for kindness. The deep maternal instinct he saw fiercely burning in her even though she had doubted its existence.

“Of course our children. Yours and mine.” He nudges his nose against hers. “We can take care of them. Pascal was a victim of a horrible plague, but that wasn’t our fault. We can be parents again, if that’s something you want.”

She nods fervently. She hadn’t thought about it – she was too afraid. Too afraid that what happened to Pascale would happen again. She hadn’t known how to be a mother and she was scared she never would. But when Bash says it she can see it bright and clear in her mind, a round pregnant belly and Bash holding a tiny child in his strong arms.

Kenna reaches up and kisses him, her hands in his hair. “I would love to have babies with you.” she grins shyly. “But I don’t want to start trying tonight.”

“No.” he agrees.

He lays them both down again on the pillows, staring at her as she snuggles up closer to him. He wipes away her stray tears and strokes her hair until she falls back to sleep.

When she dreams she dreams of a child with his bright green eyes.


End file.
